Once, I had a map which showed me the best paths I could take to get somewhere. The problem was that I had no destination. So I pondered and pondered over the routes. Sure, the map showed me only the good ones, but which would be the best?
What if I made the wrong choice? I would have no one to blame but myself. Imagining the probable regret and frustration made me turn away from the map.
I went my way.
On the way, I made many stops and experienced various emotions; excitement when I started my journey, frustration when I faced barriers, joy when I had beautiful experiences, anger when something went awry…
Although I was no stranger to such emotions, it was my first time experiencing them simultaneously.
Those times flew by as if in a dream.
The day I started my first part-time job.
The week I spent learning the proper way of holding chopsticks.
The month I entered university.
The years I worked at a temple.
The moments I considered quitting university.
The times I felt like time was leaving me behind.
The years that went by like a dream have led me to a time where I feel stuck; I keep laying my plans on the table.
Had I been arrogant in going my way? Should I have followed one of the paths the map had offered? Would I have been less lost that way?
Perhaps time will tell.
